Crazy Confessions of an Introverted Hibernator

If you're looking for a bit of inspiration or wisdom here, keep looking. This is not that kind of blog post. I just feel like I need to get something out in the open. I might be just a lot crazy. I may be the only person on the planet who feels this way. But here it is: 


I like BIG warm BEDS and I cannot lie. 

And I like big blankets. If there is one item that I would need to bring with me to a deserted island, it would be my big down comforter. Or water. It's a toss up.

It is the beginning of February, and in case you haven't heard, we just had an actual, official blizzard last week. Which is basically just like a frozen hurricane. There was a lot of wind and a lot of snow. We were blessed with 5 foot drifts in our backyard. Yay! Sledding. We had to shovel a lot but were very fortunate and very thankful that we never lost power and we had no damage to our home. Thank God. We had an experience, a little life-snow adventure. Yay us!

Another deep secret about me: I like storms. Snow storms, rain storms, thunder storms. Love them all. Well, as long as I get to stay home all warm and cozy in my big warm bed until they are over. And as long as the snow plows shut the BEEP BEEP BEEP up! I even like snow. Freshly fallen snow on a sunny day is a beautiful sight. As long as I don't have to drive in it, or shovel it, or walk in it....Oh. But sadly, I do.

There is literally tons of snow surrounding us. It is piled everywhere. You can't see around any street corner from the mountains of displaced snow that were plowed into heaps of the now dirty, packed white stuff. Roads that used to be two-lanes have pretty much become single lanes of terror. Backing  out of  our driveway is like playing Russian roulette. Is there a car coming? Hard to tell. Will I get hit? There is a goood chance, but 's really, what's my option here? Walk. But where did all the sidewalks go? Under the banks of snow.

Here's the thing about me and winter weather - it transforms me into a serial hibernator. My spirit animal really must be a bear. I just want to curl into the fetal position (but in my big, warm bed and not in a cave) and sleep until spring. Problem is I get really hungry in the winter. Like HUNGRY. And I have to get up to make something to eat. Occasionally, I even need to feed the CHILDREN. But I don't WANT TO. Nor do I want to go anywhere or do anything, especially NOT the LAUNDRY. Goodness. We could store meat in our basement....but then it would smell like dirty socks...

So, I am in the middle of winter: cold, hungry, and sleepy. So, for the love of all humanity, can't you see? Don't you understand that hibernation is imperative? That is, hibernation with hot coffee and warm baked goods....and my big comfy bed.

BUT then today happened. Today we had another foot or so of snow dropped on us. Which is fine. OK. Whatever. More snow. Just another day to hibernate, right? Children home from school. Husband home from work. Mom doing random household chores, trying to be alright with this home invasion on a Monday.

You see, me and Monday have a thing going. And typically, we get to do our thing [QUIET is our thing] ALONE on Mondays. And I love this thing we have - this blissful quiet that follows the weekend of noises. But my children just don't get this. And now, it's 7:30 pm, and they ARE STILL TALKING TO ME. After talking to me and their dad and each other and their friends over the XBOX. All. Freaking. Day. Long.

And NOW. The superintendent of schools has the nerve to call and say there is NO SCHOOL tomorrow.  He dares to CANCEL school on Tuesday too. That's 4 days straight with my people all talking to me! And now I don't want to hibernate anymore. I want to throw my children to the wolves of the public school system and go out into the world and see amazing things like art and other adult people.

And at this very moment, I want my children in bed. I want hot shower, a tall White Russian, and some Downton Abbey. Alone. Yes. That might just be the thing that will retract my claws.

And maybe tomorrow this mama bear will not want to eat her young every time they speak to her of Minecraft and Kindles and Instagram. Maybe she will feed them and cuddle them and play games with them....maybe.

Good night, fellow hibernators. And good luck.

Ashley